This article will provide tips for parents when they decide to tell their special needs child their diagnosis. Written by Cheryl Ann Scott, LMHC, this is a thoughtful method to share this sensitive information with your precious child.

WHEN TO TELL THEM: The decision if and when to tell your special needs child their diagnosis can only be determined by you, their loving parent. If you have answered yes, then you need to determine when. Your child needs to be old enough to process and make sense of the newly imparted information. Because all children vary in their ability to grasp and process information, a particular age can not be provided. As a parent of a special needs child you have, no doubt, been gifted with a "sense" of timing for your special child. I told my child about her diagnosis of Asperger's Syndrome at age 11. Do choose at time when you are at your best.

WHERE TO TELL THEM: Choose a quiet peaceful place where your child's attention will not be distracted by excessive stimuli. I chose the pool during a Mommy-Daughter swim. There were other people in the pool, however, we spoke quietly in a corner of the pool when she was having a close moment with me. The water was soothing and lovely. It worked well for us.

WHAT TO TELL THEM: Read, research and understand the diagnosis. Next, take time to think about everything your child is that is wonderful. When you begin your discussion, be sure to tell your child these wonderful things first. For example, children with Asperger's Syndrome are very smart, very attentive to detail, and very creative. After you have told your special child about their positive qualities, consider opening the subject to the hard times you have shared together. No doubt you have shared times filled with tears and frustration. Now will be the time to tell your child that there are reasons for these difficult times and you would now like to provide them answers and a "special key" to help them unlock the mystery box. The key you will now provide is the diagnosis, which opens the box of answers. Knowledge is power and the more you know about something the easier it is to manage. As you begin to speak the words of the diagnosis your child may sense great relief because very likely he or she already knew something was different about them. Do not elaborate endlessly, keep the conversation at a child friendly length of time, you will have years to discuss more.

AFTER YOU TELL THEM: After you have "the talk", it would be very nice for you to go out for some special treat or special time together. You will need to let life slide back to "normal" before the "diagnosis" became part of your dialogue with your child. Your child will want to know, from you, that life is really still OK even though they have just been given this "diagnosis". Consider a park to feed the ducks, or go for a nice bike ride, something gentle, loving and bonding. Enjoy your special child! :)

Tags & Keywords : special needs chid, diagnosis, parenting